Stacie Sherman
Journalist, Author, Blogger
Category: parenting
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The Value of Lived Experience
Autism clinicians bring essential expertise. But lived experience brings something more: context. Without that context, even the best professionals can miss what families really need.
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Cam’s Journey to Independence
Some readers may not even know I have a son, and that’s on me. I tend to write more about my daughter, Brielle. In truth, Cam has always seemed like the “easy” one, while Brielle’s journey has been more challenging.
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Letting Go While Holding On
Adjusting to life without Brielle at home has been a profound journey. Despite the emotional turmoil, I find solace in knowing she is thriving in her group home, embraced by caring staff. Yet, the haunting stories of neglect fuel our worries, reminding us of our vigilant love and advocacy.
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Ode to Jelly
Am I OK? How do I answer that? Right now I feel like I will never be OK. My 23-year-old daughter is moving into a group home in days, and I’m not OK. Externally, I guess I’m OK. I woke up today, I didn’t cry. I got stuff done. I just packed another suitcase full…
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Restless Mind
It’s 6:34 a.m. and Brielle is standing over me on my side of the bed, pressing “spaghetti” on her big pink iPad. I nod and she skips back out. I search for my glasses and my phone, throw on my sweatshirt and slippers and head toward the kitchen. I close the bedroom door behind me,…
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AI Images, Real Emotions
Do I wish she didn’t have autism? You bet I do.
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Life in Transition
I drive with my left hand on the wheel and my right on my daughter in the back seat. My husband scolds me for it. He can pound sand. Brielle usually just humors me by holding my hand loosely for maybe a minute if I’m lucky. In recent weeks, she’s been holding on longer. Just…
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April Rains
Autism consumes us, so much so that when non-autism trauma happens in our lives, it throws us. It pushes us to the very edge of our sanity. I haven’t written in a while, but I knew April was coming. I pledged I would write every day in April, as I have done in the past.…
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The Ties That Bind
I had my ex-husband and his wife over the other night for wine, beer and charcuterie. This doesn’t happen often. In fact, it was the first time. But it was needed and healing. And a bit unreal. Our anxious adult son, who was working at the time, kept texting my ex to ask if everything…
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Sudden Detours
Bumps in the winding road. The next chapter begins. It’s the first few chapters of the next book, and it’s fitting. Our lives face a critical stage. For awhile we were on a fun trip, riding a naïve wave that the toughest parts were behind us. But every time we think we have survived the…
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Happy Medicine
On a rainy weeknight, as I taught a college class, I returned to my lecture stand and my cell phone while the students did an independent task. “Let me see my daughter,” I text my husband, who is home watching Brielle so I can fulfill a lifelong dream and do this one-semester gig. A photo…
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Mixed Blessings
Being a parent to a special needs child is both a blessing and a challenge. My daughter’s gestures and expressions of love bring me immense joy, but I also bear the weight of her struggles. Despite the progress we’ve made, I remain cautious, knowing that her behaviors could resurface. Yet, her moments of happiness remind…
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Where It Began
I’m trying to write more. It’s been too long. I’ve had a lot of new followers and made a lot of new friends over the years. So I’m going to reintroduce myself. My name is Stacie, I am a lifelong New Jersey girl. I have been a journalist for more than 30 years. I’ve mostly…
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A Never-Ending Anxiety Attack
Acknowledging my inevitable mortality was the first step. Planning for her life after my life is no easy task. We are on a waiting list for residential care. I want that care to be in place before I die.
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Staying positive
“If you can’t fly then run, if you can’t run then walk, if you can’t walk then crawl, but whatever you do you have to keep moving forward.” Martin Luther King Jr.
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Counting the Ways
How do I love thee? Let me count the ways. I love thee to the depth and breadth and height my soul can reach. (Elizabeth Barrett Browning.) I love you every second, every minute, every hour. Your laugh is the sound that paints a smile on my face. Your smile is the sight that warms and…
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Cherished Moments
My life as an autism mama consists of not enough sleep, a lot of cleaning and cooking, some anxiety drugs and an occasional glass of wine or vodka/club. From time to time it includes tantrums, screaming, middle-of-the-night awakenings. It is what it is. I can’t imagine it any other way. Because it also includes love and laughter, hugs and…
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Wallowing Time
I often say writing is my therapy. God I hope this blog post does the trick. Three times yesterday, I found tears running down my face while at my desk. Once, I started hyperventilating. I’m sure my colleagues saw. I pretended they didn’t. I’m overwhelmed. The weight of the world sits on my shoulders. Usually I’m a master…
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One Word
When I started this blog, I promised myself that every time I wrote, I would be painfully honest with my readers and with myself. That even though I am an editor for a living, I would present the unedited version of my life. As Mother’s Day approaches, I write this to force myself to stop and…
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A morning without noise
This Autism Awareness Day, my beautiful Brielle is at her dad’s house, so I get a morning to sleep in. Of course I’m up at 7 a.m. So with a cup of coffee, I get to sit in my quiet kitchen and reflect upon my life as an autism mama. Moments like this are rare. I…
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My Bittersweet Birthday
I turn 42 today. That’s the age I’ve been dreading for as long as I can remember. When I allow myself to think about it, as I force myself to do now, the reality of it makes my hands shake, takes my breath away. Here I am, the same age my mother was when she…
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Here Comes The Hate Mail
Here we go. I’m putting it all out there. Once and for all, I’m going to try to explain why I don’t vaccinate my child. I’m prepared for the hate mail. It wouldn’t be the first time I’ve been called names while talking about this subject. Bring it. But before you prepare your hate-filled response, I…